It’s been over 30 years since my last confession and I have to confess that things have really gone askew! I’m not even sure my toilet swirls in the correct direction when flushed. The world has gone mad and I was hoping that you could get things fixed. I know you’re a busy guy this time of year, with all the labelling and legal hurdles you have to clear before you can bring goodies on your sleigh, but, I just need to know if the old Santa is still there…the one that can put fear in children that they might be on the naughty list. The Santa who can actually have children sit on his lap without the threat of lawsuit. Where have you been all these years? I mean, you are still Santa, right? The jolly ol’ elf that has an independent operation in the north pole? You haven’t become the “Elf formerly known as…”, or “And now, here’s Santa, sponsored by…”? You didn’t get caught up in any Ponzi schemes, did you? I don’t know why I worry about these things. Just do.
Are you feeling severely limited these days with all the regulations, restrictions, taxations, and legal ramifications? A person of your position is probably scrutinized 24/7. Labor watchdogs, potential whistle-blowers, children services and such. No wonder you don’t have the power you once did! It’s a serious shame! Innocence is lost, but not solely to perversions. It seems that it’s lost to the governmental controls, corporate greed, and the individual narcissism of people today. With all that going on, sorry to say, you never really did have a chance to survive. The world today is heading down the path of anti-Clausism. No one, save but a few, have the desire to believe in miracles. The days of dreaming have been replaced by the days of medication. Your role is being replaced by paranoia. How sad is that!
I’ve done my own tally and the best I can discern is that your “nice” list has to be really, really short. I firmly believe that all the idiots that refuse to go beyond 40 MPH down the freeway on-ramps until after they have a mile or two under their belts should not be on that list. I think you would have to agree that most of our world-wide government leaders have probably slipped from one list to the other. There is so many situations of violence, mayhem, and, just plain disorder throughout the world that one would have to imagine your trip time would be half from what it once was. Too bad you can’t take some of these “naughty listers” out behind the reindeer barn and give them all a yule log upside their heads!
Enough of that, though. I am worried for you. It is certainly hard to keep your mental and physical health intact these days with all that is going on. I remember that song with the kid singing “All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth”. I still sing that nowdays because I can’t afford the dental work. Have you seen the out-of-pocket prices? Wow! So, I sing….and sing….and wish upon a star, (or HMO, or bank loan). Plus, it is really hard to keep one’s sanity together during these times. I’ve found that the reindeer games really take a toll on folks these days, and all you end up with is the droppings! You must know that one first hand! How do you cope?
Well, I suppose I should get on with my self-indulging list of ‘what I want’ for Christmas. I am not going to ask for world peace, family love, food and shelter for the poor in the United States, bringing home the troops from overseas, justice for Caylee Anthony, our political parties to pull their heads out, jobs for the unemployed, corporate greed to subside, the end to selfishness, medical and dental care for everyone in the U.S., religions to calm down, crime to decrease, and several million other things. I am not going to ask for any of that because I believe that you have already heard those requests from the folks on your “nice” list.
What I am going to ask for is you. The Santa Claus. The one I knew as a kid. The one that captured my excitement of Christmas and kept me dreaming of magic. The Kris Kringle that created dreams inside each and every one of us. The Jolly Ol’ Elf of yesteryear is what I ask. I want to have that happy, carefree feeling within my heart, if but just for a moment. To experience the power you once radiated throughout the world that said ‘it’s ok to believe!’ If all the adults felt that, imagine what could really happen! Common Sense says that the results would be wonderful! The world needs you now, more than ever!